Today is the first day i sign up for the account of the blog..wut makes me has this kind of idea..may be recently too many things happened in my life..couldnt breathe at all..tears is dropping for many times..many advises are listened from many frens n even families seems it couldnt help me at all..may be this is the first time i fell..i felt very painful, lonely, sadness, heartbroken..thousands of words from my mouth couldnt come up..during that time. i saw them shopping for the stuffs on going out to overseas, only me, the only me still stepping at the same step, couldnt go as far as them..felt soo sad..i even used liquor to made me forget evything but it seems useless. i thought nobody will know my sadness but he did noticed..that time i really think that he is the only person who can understand me, who knows, the one who knows me soo much are the one who hurt me lots..the hurts that i had are more thousands cuts in my body...is bleeding..my heart was bleeding..because of some nonsenses, we are over...that time i felt like i lost evything..studies and him..made me seems like i lose everything..luckily she is beside me and support me all the time n help me to go thru my hard times...im reli appreciate her for evything that she did..thanks...i did promise to myself..i will never ever tuen back time even if he wishes to turn back..no such things should happen..i will not drop into that deep andblack hole again..all the things that he gave me seems meaningless to me...he did gv lots of memories to me but the sadness more than the happiness..sumtimes, in mind, there are a thought of thinking i wish i can turn back time, turn back to the time that i wish i never ever meet him..may be there will not be many hard times..nvm..it is over, this is wut i told myself for evyday..i used many things to forget him such as music..this is the only things to relieve me..without it, my mind will surrounding wit him...i believe i can go thru it...times are needed..there is still a long road for me to go thru..i shud go straight wit no turning back...cheerz st..i can do it!!!
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